trying to take control

There's nothing like your child totally disrespecting you. He just has no respect for mom and all of it for dad. What makes me so different? He wouldn't clean up his room, he wouldn't take a nap, he was just on his own time schedule. I theatened not going swimming, I tried to tell him why and he just didn't care. So I tried a new technique...I put him in his room and told him he needed to stay in there and I shut the door. I think that lasted a whole 10 minutes and then he kept coming out and there were toys everywhere. So I told him if he came out again I was putting the lock on. That didn't seem to matter because he came right out. So I put the lock on and how quickly the tears came. I went in there to reason and he said, 'you get out. I don't want you! I want daddy!'. This went on for about 5-10 minutes until he passed out on the floor. My heart is broken.